This summer, Martine took part in her first guided silent Jesuit retreat at Barmouth. Here, she reflects in her own words on the journey, the challenge of entering into silence, and what she discovered through prayer, nature and the friendships formed along the way.
I went to Barmouth for my first guided silent Jesuit retreat with excitement. I had never experienced a retreat centred on silence before, and I wanted to discover what it might offer me: a chance to step away from the constant noise and busyness of everyday life, spend time with God and listen more deeply.
The journey itself became part of the experience. A cancelled train and a change to bus travel unexpectedly gave me the opportunity to meet and connect with others who were also travelling to the retreat. We continued the journey together towards Barmouth, sharing the uncertainty and anticipation of this new experience.
The journey offered magnificent views of hills, valleys, the sea, bridges and open countryside. I was reminded that God can be encountered in the world around us. By the time I arrived at the retreat house, I felt that the journey had already begun preparing me for what was to come.
I was unsure of what to expect and how the days would unfold. Entering into silence was not as easy as I had imagined. The first couple of days were marked by tiredness from the journey, and my mind was busy and often wandered. With the help of my spiritual director, I soon began to settle into the experience. I learned that prayer is not about quantity but quality: accepting the moment, being present and attentive, and having the intention to listen to what God might be saying, to see God in all things, and to be grateful.
Through the Spiritual Exercises, workshops, adoration and prayer, I was encouraged to notice God’s presence in the ordinary moments of each day. My surroundings and walking became prayer. Time beside the sea became an opportunity to reflect and place some of my fears into God’s hands. I began noticing things I might normally pass without seeing: trees, blackberries, birdsong, the changing sky and a sunset. In the silence, these simple things seemed to speak more deeply.
The retreat was not only about solitude. The people I met became an important part of the experience. Through our Magis groups at the end of each day, we shared reflections, listened to one another and gave thanks. Although we had arrived as strangers, we quickly became a community, united by the desire to seek God and grow in faith.
Gradually, the silence became less uncomfortable and more of a gift. I began to appreciate the space it created to pray, listen, reflect and simply be. I discovered a different rhythm, away from the constant demands and distractions of ordinary life.
When it was time to leave, I felt a sense of loss. I had begun to settle into this new way of praying and living, and returning to everyday life felt like leaving a world I had only just discovered.
I left Barmouth with a renewed desire to carry something of that silence into daily life: to listen more carefully, notice God’s presence, practice gratitude and make space for prayer. I arrived wondering what silence would teach me. I left discovering that silence is not emptiness. It is an invitation to listen and recognise that God is already within us, if only we can become silent enough to notice.
Jesuit Young Adult Ministries offer opportunities to deepen faith, explore Ignatian spirituality and become part of a welcoming community. Based in Central London, Glasgow and Edinburgh, the groups offer programmes of prayer, retreats, talks, social events and opportunities for spiritual accompaniment. New programmes have now been published for the year ahead, with opportunities to get involved in Central London, Glasgow and Edinburgh. You can find out more about that here.
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